Lewk how originel and clever i am!
by FishtheMighty
Summary: Tomo Mizuki addresses her anger towards crappy fanfiction and procedes to write the worst  Hetalia  fanfiction ever to be read.  The "plot"?  Natalia turns goth/emo to impress Ivan.  That is all you need to know.


First of all, let me just say this is a parody. If I really wrote like this, I would kill myself because I wouldn't be able to express myself through writing without having my eyes bleed.

Also, everything in this story (including author's notes) was written on wordpad. Which means no spell check, and no auto-capitals. So some stuff in the author's notes may be mispelled. That is all.

...

liek oms (oh mi satan. this is my forst fanfic. i hope u liek it cuz if u dont it mens u r a stewpid prep.

anywayz, i always wanted 2 rite a fanfic and i liek hettalia. so i rote a fanfic for it. sugoy!

Chapter 1: welcum 2 teh black parade (i named it after a mcr song. rn't i clever?)

naytalia was eating a sandeich. it was a good sandwich. it had musterd, lettece, ham, and bred. she relly lieked her sandwich. she bnought the sandwich at a shop. they had good sandwiches. they were nown for sandiwhced. the sandwich wasnt expencive cause it waz on sail. the bred was very fluffy. the lettece was green. she remembered y she didnt liek torris, cause his i's looked liek lettece. she made a :( face. she waz sad her brother didnt liek her. that made her emo and she cut herself.

'this sandwich has no mayonase, just like my soul.' she said all emolike. she herd footsteps and she got owt her nife to cut the motherfuckerz throught open and eat ther blud then cut her wrist because she is emo and emos are awesome and so not overrated.

'what the fuck are you dewing, bitch/' it was...lili. natalia gasped. lili died her hair blak like the midnight ski and she had blak eye liner and brit red eye shadow that waz teh coler of blud. she had blak lip stik on 2. she had a blak and wite stripped shirt with a blak corset over it. she hjad a blak leather mini over black and wite stripped leggings and nee-high boots.

'oh mi saten' i said. 'that is so kawai.'

'i kno rite? my brother sayd i shuldnt where tis, so i bust a cap in his ass and spent all his moneh on tehse cloths.'

'i wish i culd aford clothes liek tat. ten my brother mite liek me.'

'well, i still have some money. we can go shopping!'

'were?'

'at hot topic, duh! imma give u a full make over!'

i grined all hapylike, but ten my jaw hurt because i smiled wich mens i have to drink orfan tears to maek teh pane go away.

...

natalia looked at herself after teh makeover. her hair was blak with red hi-lites andn blue polka dots. she had wite fondation wich made her look pale cause in this sociaty, u want to look either relly pale, or orange like an ompa loompa. she ha dpurple eyeshodow and lipstick and black press on nails. she had a black corset dress with ripped plack fish nets and a pair of silletos that were blak as well. teh dress made her bewbs look evin bigger.

'bruther will so want me now.' i tout. i walked down the hall and bumped into toris.

'wow, u look like a whore.' he said. i punched him in the noze,

'ur just jelis cause u cant have me caus brother wants me.'

ten, toris grew jet paks on his feet, and flew up into teh sky to dance on teh dubble rainbow.

...

tah nite, natalia decided to change her name. cuz natalia arlovskya sound like teh name of some1 u can respect, and respect was not going to het ivan to nail her. so she changed her name 2 Ravin Nitewish Zuna Sandwich Potato Midnite-Chan. it relly fits her i think, like a noose.

wen toris saw her again, she was so hot he got an erection!

'omg u r so hot.' he says.

i flipped him off, dont get in teh way of me and browther. and i left him with teh magical pumpkins and orange juice shooting munchkins.

...

how waz tat/ if u are wondering y toris was so wird, its cuse hes on drugs. i think drugs are an important subject and i wanted to adress it.

Edit: ok, my grammer is fien! i got teh letter A written on my shirt once wich means i am relly smart (the person who did it sayd somting about teh scarlet letter, but idk wut tat mens).

also, i tink natalia as a emo is a gewd and original idea. no1 used it b4!

...

Hey guys, Tomo Mizuki here, and today's lesson is: there's a difference between being original, and doing something so stupid, no one bothered to try it. Thank you, and goodnight.


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